"I'd rather vacuum my floor mats..."

I have been promising my car a good washing for a few weeks. Since I like to keep my promises and I have a soft spot for my car, tonight was car wash night.

Coin operated car washes are brilliant. You control the way your car gets washed, they are a great way to bond with your car, and inevitably there can be a water fight.

I pulled into the local car cleaning place. There are four bays. Three were filled with men and their trucks. I got the fourth. I love Alberta. I stood out more for driving a car than for washing my car in heels.

My car looks hot.

Is it a bad thing if I like my car more than you, gentle reader? Well at the least you know it's safe getting a ride with me - I like my car too much to let any harm come to it.

HYPER

Ok, so if energy cannot be created or destroyed, then where does hyperness come from?
And why can't one literally jump off walls?

Confession

I have a deep dark secret.

Even though it was still summer, I liked crunching dried leaves.
But now it's autumn, so the leaves are allowed to fall and be crushed.

Proof that aliens exist

The rules for citing works in different forms are ridiculously and needlessly complicated.

There is no way any one could have been that anal about punctuation as to develop these rules.

That's where the aliens come in.

The Monkeys are coming! The Monkeys are coming!

Question of the day: suppose you were a reasonable monkey and you could chose between picking your own bananas and taking them out of the hands of other monkeys. What would you do?

Once upon a bus-ride dreary

I made my best friend laugh today.

That is not a terribly remarkable feat in and of itself; the notable difference this time around was that I made her laugh by saying: "I've done my all my readings for my classes today; that's the third day in a row."
"That's cute. This will last until what? Next week?" quoth she.

Actually my readings are remarkably engaging (once one gets through the introductions and prefaces).

There are intriguing case names like the Montana Mule case, and interesting cases about spelunkers.

There are insightful summarizations like "one very simple formula of reasonable restraint that appeals alike to reasonable monkeys, wolves, gangsters, Salmon packers, and Roman emperors is the rule of first occupancy."

But perhaps the best part of my readings for the night was a reference to the case of Miner v CPR where the defendant mistakenly read the word "Bawlf" as "Banff" and put a corpse off at a wrong station.

Similarly, during a regrettably unforgettable field trip in grade 8, a classmate of mine made the exact same mistake. So instead of really seeing the mountains we saw Heisler. Followed by ice cream.

Has anyone else ever realized a trend of having ice cream after unpleasant experiences?

Jumping from the frying pan into the fire

If you believe some scientists, then it would seem that the world as we know it will shortly be devastated by the effects of global warming. However, with the summer that has just been suffered in Edmonton, one might argue that global warming should hurry up already so that there might be some sun and heat. (Anyone about to suffer an Edmonton winter would undoubtedly concur.)

To reconcile the doomsayers' predictions of impending calamity with the seemingly colder reality, I have a theory. Having an infinitesimal knowledge of the subject, I anticipate that a gentle reader with a vaster wisdom might be able to correct my misguided and unscientific hypothesis. Until then, my postulations:

1) If the trend of increasing global temperatures do occur, resulting in melting ice caps, then there would be more water, higher water levels, and in general a greater surface area that is filled with water.

2) My grade 4 science classes taught me that water evaporates; I later learned that higher temperatures or higher surface areas would increase the rate of evaporation, therefore, if 1) is correct, there should be higher rates of evaporation.

3) Water in its different forms is part of a greater water cycle: evaporation-condensation-precipitation. If 2) is true, then there would be more water going through the cycle. If so, this would explain the increase in precipitation in Edmonton this summer.

4) If 3) is true and there is an increase in precipitation, this precipitation is likely to cool down the global temperatures, temporarily suspending the trend of global warming.

5) Or not.

Walked around my good intentions

Having just attended my first day of classes, I have received some good advice:

The quicker you fall behind, the longer you have to catch up.

Ground Control to Major Tom

I can remember May.
It was followed by June.
After that, July was memorable too.
Then there was the Fringe;
and now it's September.
Somehow I lost August.

But, I remember some random snippets from that late summer blur:

-Best wisdom I've heard in a while: Girls are evil, boys are dumb. (Good things science has found a way to eliminate the dumb half of the world.)

-The background music to Trogdor can be addictive. If can also be abused by some people.

-There is something primal and wonderful about bonfires. It comes from the same part of the brain that likes senseless destruction and shredders.

-Big Macs have infiltrated too many countries.

-Watching spaghetti break is amusing. Actually breaking it is addictive.

-I was invited to give a speech at my friends' future wedding to wish them a future that is filled with good fortunes and smushed spiders.

-Question of the day: do you instinctively want to kick pumpkins when you see them.

Today's sensicality has been brought to you by protein pills and pool sharks.